me: it’s back. IT’S BACK.

(tivo button noises.)

james, holding the tivo remote, glares over at me.

me: i don’t know how you don’t just throttle me.

james: i don’t either.

me: seriously, I would. I am so annoying sometimes.

james: sometimes?

me: I wouldn’t be able to stand me.

james: it’s because i love you.

me: SUCKER.*

* This conversation may have an altered ending because the chronicler may have allegedly had a drink or two and may have already forgotten how it ended even though it was only 2 minutes ago. Allegedly.

my brain has been swirling with thoughts that i keep thinking, “I should put that on my blog!”

So this might be a little scattered.

LET’S JUST GET THE POOP OUT OF THE WAY RIGHT OFF THE BAT

We have had many a day when we are lying in bed all groggy and half a wake Saturday morning and we hear Jocelyn’s little holler, “Moooooommmmy!!! I’m pooooooooopy! I took off my diiiiiiaaaaaaaaper!”

Nothing will get you out of bed like that sort of wake up call. We are still haunted, HAUNTED I SAY, by Ethan’s Excrement Extravaganza (we just refer to it as E cubed) when we walked into Ethan’s room and were accosted by the sight and smell of a poop-smeared room. Walls, carpet, bedding, even INSIDE THE DRESSER DRAWERS, people. It was awful beyond the imagination.

So while in the back of our mind, we know that REALLY, the worst is behind us, still those poopy words shore will spring you into action!

It wasn’t that bad. (I score “stripping the bed and tossing everything in the wash” as “not that bad.” you have to look at things comparatively, people.)

TUUUUUURKEY

We have had a succession of kind of laid back thanksgivings. Just us. Just our little family. Usually, I make way too much food and no one under age 30 eats anything except pie and bread, which can be exceedingly frustrating for the chef.

James handled the turkey this year, and while we had a little moment of fearing it was overdone, it was perfect, as usual. (Brining is the way to go, people. Let’s BRINE THE CHILDREN.)? I only made some dressing, and the thanksgiving must, Company Carrots.* Last year, I don’t remember what I made, but it was a hairy sort of day and I remember being sort of cross and tired all day. This year = much more laid back. Also, I’m over the dressing I usually make. It was just OK, and I didn’t even save any for leftovers. Next year it’ll be something new. Dessert didn’t consist of pie. It consisted of chocolate mousse torte cake. And it was gooooooood.

I had to work Friday, which wasn’t so bad. It was nice to sail down the highway to work with no traffic whatsoever. It was shocking to look at the mall and see the parking lot FULL at 8am. I stopped at McDonalds that was near the Microcenter, and it was stuffed full of people. I went to work and it was blissfully quiet and I got a ton of work done. I took a break and did some crappy blurry camera phone pictures of myself with my new haircut/dye job, so I’ll have to post those sometime.

HAIRCUT? DYE JOB? WHAT’S THIS?

So I decided to go blonde for the winter. I walked into the salon Wednesday night, sat down, and said, “I’d like to go blonde. I realize this is hard with red hair, but I really don’t want to walk out of here as a strawberry blonde.”

I walked out with strawberry blonde hair, and a haircut that I have to describe as Melissa would say, made me look like a mushroom.

I was quite happy with the color, actually, but the haircut I got fixed on Friday. It’s all a bit shorter than I would like, but really, I’m easy. It’s hair. It grows back. You don’t like it? Give it time, and try again. It may be a bit more strawberry than I’d like, but I can fix that in January.

I had a bit of a dilemma in the spring when I dyed it red. See, I have been dying my hair red since high school. Then through sheer force of will, I managed to NOT dye it for a while. Long enough that it grew out my natural color and there was no more red. So going back to red was a bit of a struggle in the amy brain, but as soon as I got back to the, “what the hell are you freaking out about, IT’S HAIR IT GROWS BACK JUST DO IT ALREADY” then i was fine. and i gotta say, i love the red hair, i just thought blonde would be fun for a while.

OH MY GOD LIKE WE REALLY DIDN’T WANT TO KNOW THAT MUCH ABOUT YOUR HAIR

Ok, then I’ll talk about Jocelyn’s! I sat down with her today and french braided her hair. Of course, I had to put Dora on in order for her to hold still long enough, but it was so much fun. Like having my own little barbie doll to play hair with. It was really too short to stay in, and so we took it out after 5 minutes before it just fell out, but it was such fun. She is such a sweetheart. She is doing and saying so many intolerably cute things every day. She just kills me with all the cute.

LET’S GET TO THE CHRISTMAS STUFF ALREADY

So Ethan has been anxiously counting down to the christmas holiday since before halloween. It seems like as SOON as Thanksgiving was over, he was like, “Next is Christmas, RIGHT???” We told him yes, and Saturday found us digging out our Christmas decorations, and going tree shopping. Yes, the tree has been purchased and it is up and decorated. Christmas stockings are hung. And taken down, and carried around and rehung, and pointed out, and described, and taken down and put on little feet, and then rehung again.

Now we just need to get all these boxes outta here. and the gourds. Sorry gourds, you are no longer seasonably appropriate. You must go. Plus, you were starting to get a little wrinkly, so into the compost bin you go. If you’ll fit.

I HAVE TO WORK TOMORROW

I actually had to work a bit this weekend too, but working from the comfort of your couch while watching Gilmore Girls off your Tivo and Season 1 Battlestar Galactica (we’re done now, and WOW, what a finale. Gotta get Season 2 SOON!) and getting up early and actually putting on CLOTHES and driving into the office… that will suck.

BUT AT LEAST THINGS WILL BE CLEAN WHEN I COME HOME

because we managed to get a lot of stuff cleaned up around here this weekend. half of our garage had been littered with bikes, wagons, … and other junk that i can’t picture now that it’s all cleaned up, which means MY CAR IS ACTUALLY HOUSED IN THE GARAGE! YAY ME! this is especially good because Friday has raine with a chance of SNOW SNOW SNOW! so it’ll be nice to park in the garage and not have to worry about frost/snow on the car.

We also cycled through quite a bit of laundry. I knew you wanted to know ALL about it.

I NEED TO BRAIN-VOMIT MORE OFTEN

Because if i get it all out more regularly, then I don’t make these ridiculously long posts with lots of nonsense in them. I’ll try to do better.

ONE LAST THING

Last week, I tried to get the sitter for the weekend (not this last weekend, but the week before) and the sitter left a message at the speed of light and I just took it to mean that she could not make it. So I called and told her I didn’t quite understand her message, but I was going to assume she was busy.

BUT SHE WASN’T! SHE WASN’T! SHE WAS AVAILABLE! And let me tell you, when you THINK you can’t go out, and then you CAN, it’s almost better than chocolate and peanut butter after lots of sex (almost).

We decided to hurry and try to finish up the christmas shopping before a movie. Then we were starving so we stopped at California Tortilla, got stuff to go, and snuck it into the new Bond movie (it was good, despite the blonde Bond. You wouldn’t think I would be prejudiced, having decided to go blonde myself, but sadly, I am, and it’s a hard one to get over, but it was still good). I still want to go see Stranger than Fiction. Afterward we went to Sweetwater Tavern and shared a flourless chocolate waffle while just wallowing in our kidlessness for just a FEW MINUTES LONGER.. Ahh. heaven.

OK THIS IS THE LAST THING

This friday: James’ company holiday party.

Next THURSDAY (can we say “cheap?”): my company holiday party.

All I can say is, better have open bar.

A new suit was purchased for James today, and I purchased some new duds last Friday (yes, I braved the crowds on my way home, and it wasn’t too bad). Note for next year: take some dance classes before the holiday parties, so we have something to do and won’t get bored and just wnat to go home and watch tv.

I hope they’ll be fun.

THE END.

– amy knows december isn’t til next week, but she put up the new banner anyway.

* When me and my siblings were little, company carrots was our very favorite dish at thanksgiving. My mom would tell us she would make however many carrots we would peel, and we would peel 2-3 5lb bags at least. I’m 32 now, and it’s still my favorite. Very simple, too. Yum.

CINDERELLY

Cinderella has become the latest favorite movie in our house. Yes, even Ethan. He LOVES the mice. He watches Gus trying to pick up ALL those pieces of corn while the cat is stalking him and he laughs his ASS off. We need to record some good old Tom & Jerry for that boy because he will eat it up.

HALLOWEEN

More on the making of Jocelyn’s costume (can you tell I’m very proud of my accomplishments?). We had bought her a costume which had a white hat and a cow-spotted vest and little fringey wrist thingees. “Eh,” I thought at the time, but there you go. Later we found her a pink cowboy hat, which she’s been wearing everywhere, and so when I was in the fabric store and saw a little pamphlet on making a fringed bag with fleece, the lightbulb went on.

I bought some pink fleece, and then I got a little jean jacket for her on sale at Target and took an old pair of her pants (sized 24 months, it’s amazing they even fit her, seeing as how everything she wears is 3T at this point), and sewed on some hot pink fringe. Ethan kept trying to convince me to cut the fringe off. He was sure I just didn’t know what he was talking about, because obviously, once I understood, I would jump at the chance, so he got paper and scissors, cut some paper fringe, and then made me watch as he snipped off all the fringe to make confetti. “See mommy?! Come on! Let’s do it!”

Even though Ethan’s design point of view was thwarted, I am pretty proud of her outfit. I had to hand sew most of the fringe onto the bottom of her jeans, as the pantleg was too narrow to fit around the bottom of the machine, and my machine was on the fritz to begin with (couldn’t get the tension correct) and by the time I had to resort to hand sewing, it was waiting by the door to go get repaired. She was definitely the belle of the ball last night:

Fashion fashion fashion! (IE: new cheap shoes)

I have a new pair of shoes that I got for 20 bucks at target. I call them my tarty school marm shoes.

Because they have that klunky blocky (that is so popular this decade*) librarian school marm look paired with a 3 inch heel. This is very high for me. VERY HIGH. In fact, I wore them around my office for a day (w/out wearing them outside) because I was positive I would have to take them back because my feet would die from them being too high. I can manage a 2″ or even a 2 1/2″ heel, but these suckers are HIGH (again, high for ME). I am amazed that I can totally wear them. Even in Costco (lots of walking around). Wow! ME! Tarty! Who knew??
*and yet you’d never see one on Sex and the City and Stacey London always wants to set them on fire. Perhaps I should rethink my choices….. NAH.

So I quite like my new shoes. Which is nice, because remember when I lost my wallet at TJ Maxx? Looking at shoes? Dreaming of shoes? Spent the next month WANTING CUTE SHOES? Well, I went back (a month and a half later) because those nice shoes kept swimming around in my head and I WANTED THEM DAMMIT and they had NO cute shoes. I was heart broken. So when I found cute 20 dollar shoes, I found some solace. However, they ARE cheap.. which means…. Stinky feet. Cheap shoes means manmade plasticy materials that make my feet sweat instead of breathing, and sweat = STINK. My tarty school marm shoes are very stinky. That’s the only downside to cheap shoes. That, and they fall apart in a year. I have a pair of heeled sandals that my mother bought me at Nordstrom that I’ve had for .. oh gosh, I’m old, probably 13 years that only JUST gave up the ghost this past summer (and I’m not yet giving up that they’re not really ok, just a flesh wound, they’re going for a walk, in just a moment.. they feel HAPPEEEEEE….. ahem).

So. Stinky, tarty, school marm shoes. I like em:

Let me say for the record, that only his daughter could get him to do this. It was nothing *I* said, trust me. That girl has got her daddy wrapped around her finger. JUST AS SHE SHOULD. So of course, I dived for the camera.
SADNESS

I wasn’t going to post anything about this, but most of our friends read this (or have spouses that do), and I think people would like to hear.. James had to say goodbye to his dog last Saturday. He and his sister Sandi adopted Cydney, a sweet black lab, when they were in college at VA Tech. She was probably about 11-12 years old. I call her our time share dog, because sometimes we have her, and sometimes Sandi has her. It’s a very convenient arrangement when vacations roll around. Erm. It was. 🙁 She broke her UC ligament a few months ago and has gone downhill snce then. We hadn’t seen her since before the accident, but James went and picked her up last Wednesday. We were a little shocked to see the condition she was in. Unable to walk easily, shivering, sores all over her body from her licking and worrying away at herself. She was not a happy dog. Friday when James came home, she had thrown up a few times. He called Sandi, and Saturday morning, they all met at the vet’s office and said goodbye. It was for the best. But it was a sad day.

We miss you, Cydney.

– amy

so this past weekend has been a busy busy one. I actually dreamed Saturday morning that it was halloween night and I hadn’t made Jocelyn’s costume, and couldn’t find her boots and the people that opened the door to her were like, “Uhhh… what is she supposed to be?” James said it sounded like those dreams he has of not finishing his homework in time. Ergh. – Random tangent. Whenever I was sick and had those messed up feverish dreams in high school, I was always doing math problems. Trying to solve for X, what was X? Lines and lines of working out the 2 sides of an algebraic problem trying to find x in that weird dreaming state where everything is surreal and yet you can feel the pencil gripped tightly in your hand as you cancel out the +2 on both sides, etc. You would think this means that algebra was my worst nightmare, but the opposite was true. I love math. Tangent over.

So this weekend I made Jocelyn’s costume, broke my sewing machine (it is now “out of timing” according to the repairman) had to hand sew the last bits, made gingerbread cookies for Ethan’s class, along with other non-time-pertinent things. We all went to Costco (where miraculously, Ethan NOR Jocelyn saw the rows and rows of toys and demanded to be driven down them) to get more floor padding stuff to go under the laminate flooring in the basement, which I am finally trying to get going on again. There is a sad corner of about 6′ by 3′ that is started on. It is going to be a pain in the ass just because of how much shit we have in that room. Not really anywhere to move it to, so it’s tricky. The nice thing about laminate is as soon as part of it is laid, you can put stuff on it right away. I just need to get some done so some stuff can be moved over onto it to make room for the rest of the floor to be laid. It’s a catch 22.

Anyway, I was all nervous about remembering the items that needed to get done for Halloween and the kids’ school “Masquerade” party. This is because I guess Halloween is evil and they don’t want to celebrate it. So instead, they make masks and have a party the DAY BEFORE HALLOWEEN. That’s right. THe party was Monday. When did I think it was? Today, of course. HALLOWEEN. Ergh. So even though we HAD the cookies all made for Ethan’s party (gingerbread cookie cutouts no less, not just drop cookies) and HAD the bag of candy for Jocelyn’s party (someone else had already signed up for cupcakes, so I grabbed candy), I thought the party was on Tuesday. And so nothing went in to school. Ethan was sad that there weren’t any cookies at his class party. Jocelyn was kind of oblivious, and kept calling the bag of candy, “MY BIRTHDAY PARTY! I WANT MY BIRTHDAY PARTY!” (“You mean your MASQUERADE PARTY CANDY, honey.” “YEAH! MY PARTY CANDY! MY BIRTHDAY PARTY CANDY!” Bah.)

Anyway. Kind of bummed. After the kids were in bed, and we had watched 2 fraking episodes of Battlestar Galactica (we’re still on season 1), I sighed.

me: “I can’t beleive the parties were today. I mean, I made cookies! I bought candy! You would think the damn party would be tomorrow, ON HALLOWEEN.”

james: “Yeah. That sucks.”

me: *sigh* “I’m a bad mother.”

james: *flips a page in his magazine.*

me: *glares at him*

james: *totally oblivious. FINALLY looks up. sees me looking at him.*

me: *gives him a more obvious glare, that says, “welllllll?”*

james: *the cogs finally start to turn in his head* finally he blurts out, “You’re not a bad mother.”

me: *glancing down at my pretend watch on my wrist*

james: *blush*

me: “You are fired.”

Scene: Last night, about 9pm. Living room. I’ve been sitting in front of the TV reading blogs and finishing up my CD ripping for the last hour. James comes up from his office downstairs and flops into a chair.

James: Hi.

me: Hi.

James: Let’s not ever get divorced.

me: Ok. Good plan.

james: It’s just too much of a pain in the ass.

me: Sounds good.

me: I, Amy, take you James, as my husband for…. EVER!

James grins.

me: Now you.

james: I, James, take you amy, as my wife FOR-EEEEEVER!

I grin.

I kiss my fingertips and then leaaaannnn over. He kisses his fingertips and leaaans over and we both start making those little, “ooh can I reach without falling over?” noises until our fingertips touch and we slouch back in our respective seats.

me: Good, now we don’t have to bother with all that renewing our vows crap on our 10th anniversary.

james: Saves us some dough.

me: Yeah. Now we can just spend it on booze and wenches.

james: Amen.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

I LOVE YOU!

(cont)

I haven’t written about it, because my rule of websites is, “Always assume the one person you don’t want to read it, WILL.” Heehee. Good rule, eh? So, now that it is all gone through, it’s OK to share.

James got a great job offer from a great company and has accepted it. We have a couple of our friends that work there and like it. He has actually been in touch with the company since before CHRISTMAS, and he put his resume in for it LAST SUMMER, so it’s been a while in the works, though progress has only really been made in the last week or so. Turns out the HR person he was talking to (and kept missing) left, and he was contacted by someone new, who really took charge and got things done. He went in for an interview yesterday, and was offered the job this morning. My only beef with him is that he didn’t even do the courtesy, “Let me think about it, discuss it with my wife, and get back to you,” spiel, he just TOOK IT. Hahaha! However, we both knew he was going to take it, and the offer was even better than he expected, so I can forgive him not talking to me about it first 🙂 The money is good, the benefits are good, especially in that they HAVE SOME, whereas in his old job there was vacation, and that was about it.

He told his boss about it this morning, and apparently there was some carrot dangling that was probably kind of laughable, because the boss has dangled the carrot before, in terms of yearly review/ raises end of year bonuses, etc, and when the carrot actually comes, it is always a let down. James pretty much told him that even if he matched it (which I don’t think is even possible, due to the benefits) he would still leave. There was a lot of, “ahhh… well, you might be tossing a lot of money away..” sort of talk, but it was a bunch of HOOEY.

I don’t know if James is a good interviewer, because I’ve never seen him in interviews, but I do know that the one fault he has is that he undervalues himself. He is too modest. I never have that problem, honestly, I’m a greedy bitch 🙂 When I was leaving the second “real” job I ever had, I shopped myself around, got myself two offers, played them against each other, and took the better one at a 15k raise (remember, this was at the very beginning of my career, so it was basically raising me out of the level of poverty, haha). I’m just that kind of person. James is a much nicer, genial sort of man. The job he has now, he took after being laid off for 2 months (with only 3 months severance pay) with me being SEVEN MONTHS PREGNANT. I was working, but as a contractor with no benefits, and I would not have paid time off to give birth. He was under a good bit of pressure (talk about an understatement)! He took the first decent job that came along, at a salary that he should have laughed at. Four years later, some job benefits that made up for that lack of salary have eroded away, and the salary/ bonus promises that were made originally never really paid off.

When we went into this situation, he even turned to me one night and said, “Now you’re going to have to tell me what to say in the interview, when they ask about money, Miss I-had-two-offers!” I did tell him things he could say, and we discussed all the bogus froo-froo-y interview questions that might come up, “If you were a tree, what sort of tree would you be?*” and what he could reply to them. Maybe I said something that helped, but more accurately, they recognized a good nerd when they saw one 🙂

* I actually have never been asked this, but you have to agree that there are definitely weird interview questions that sometimes come up. Like, “What is your biggest weakness?” that you’re supposed to somehow make be an asset, like, “Oh, gosh, I guess I’d have to say, I’m just TOO ORGANIZED, it SUCKS.” Yeah right.

Seeing him get this offer is just the best feeling in the world. He is the hardest worker I know, he hardly ever misses a day sick, he works his ass off, he doesn’t complain (except to me!) gets the job done even when he has his family to take care of and school to attend. He has not really liked working with the people he has worked with the last four years. He hasn’t minded some of them, but he hasn’t had the nice camaraderie of colleagues that become friends to help him get through his work day and make going to work ENJOYABLE. He hasn’t had a good company environment, he hasn’t been appreciated for his SUPREME talents, and if anyone deserves a rewarding, well-paid position IT IS JAMES. I am just so proud of him and excited for him and excited for getting out of the suck-joy hell hole that he is currently employed at, that I could just burst.

No one deserves it more, honey.

WAY TO GO!

Plus now, as my friend Greg said, we can definitely get me a bike for my birthday. 🙂

I mean, WAY TO GO!

It’s been an exciting day, here at the Panders’ household. Except that we weren’t actually in the house when any of it happened, but you get the idea.

First up. Health. And a Project Skinny Update.

I wrenched a muscle in my back on Saturday night. You can probably noodle through exactly what I was doing when it got wrenched. Ahem. It showed up Sunday, and DAMN did it hurt. The knotted muscle was just under/to the side of my shoulder blade, but it was knotted so badly that it radiated all through my back and shoulder and down my arm and even through my rib cage and made it hard to breath, if i was slouching. Monday was no better. I woke up feeling GREAT, and even told James that it appeared to have unkinked. By the time I got to work, however, I was dying. I took two Aleve, and another by the end of the afternoon. The total you’re supposed to take in a 24 hour period is 3. I’ve never taken 3 in a 24 hr period. By night fall I was in agony. My arm felt like I had carpal tunnel syndrome, and my neck kept twanging strangely and it brought on a massive headache. By last night at bedtime, I decided I was going to the doctor, because I just couldn’t take it anymore.

So on the way to work, I called to make an appointment. I switched insurance when I got my job, so I haven’t been to the doctor I selected as my primary care before. Because of this, I couldn’t just see the nurse practitioner, I had to see the Dr., and the receptionist informed me that the earliest time open was February 10th. I was literally flabbergasted. I couldn’t seem to form words.

her: “We have an opening on February 10th.”
me: *silence, and then* “But…. I’m….. How….”
her: …..
me: *trying to form a coherent sentence* “But I’m sick now.”
(I’m sick now? What am I, four?)
her: …..
me: “I just.. I don’t… I … Should I find another doctor then, I just.. I don’t know how to respond to that.”
her: “Hold on a minute.”

She put on someone else, who listened to me whine and then told me they’d try to fit me in at 11am.

So I went to the doctor’s office, early of course, because there’s always new patient paperwork. I filled it all out, being careful to mark everything correctly especially in those, “Do you feel anxiety, sadness, or agitation with no explicit reason?” type questions. Here’s my chance to make sure I’m basically evaluating myself correctly. I went in and did the usually nurse flibber flabber, and then saw the doctor. first we discussed the back issues. I cannot lift my children, under any circumstance. I knew this. Jocelyn weighs 30 lbs, and she’s not even two. I am going to have to really really really try to remember this. Ethan is 40 lbs, and I lift him up and down every day into the truck. Ugh. She gave me some muscle relaxers too, that I can use 3x a day if they don’t make me lose focus, and if so, then just 1x a day, before bed. I can feel them working already.. Ahhhhh..

So, next, we discussed the mental health, which I had noted. I told her about last summer how I really was doing poorly, but going back to work seemed to alleviate a lot of that. I explained how it seems to come on about once a month, and she suggested it might be premenstrual. James and I discussed that too, once, and I told him I’d rather be crazy then have it all be PMS. James of course would rather be able to blame the hormones than a crazy brain, but then that’s a man. All the men who are reading this are probably nodding along with the James take, but I don’t know, it’s just FRUSTRATING, when you vent and storm and get all crazy and then have ALL YOUR EMOTIONS INVALIDATED by someone saying, “Oh, it’s just PMS.” It kind of invalidates YOU, and that sucks. I can see how it would be nice to not be crazy, but it is just as not nice to have yourself and your feelings totally ignored and labeled under “PMS.” SUCKS. I’d rather be crazy, and get to OWN these emotions and actions. But there it is, could just be hormones. Anyway, she said it sounded fine, and if it seemed to get out of control to come see her and we would work it out.

Then, she asked about the general health issues in the past, and I told her about the 2 c-sections, and the gall bladder going out. I hadn’t brought up my weight, so she did, and I quickly told her that I AM working on it, and I have managed to lose 10 pounds since Thanksgiving, but that I was getting frustrated and it was very hard. That is when she suggested an appetite suppressant. (!!!) Honestly, I didn’t think there really was this sort of thing around anymore. I was skeptical at first, but she talked me into it. The downside is that they do beat up on your heart, but as she said, carrying around this extra weight is much worse for my heart. The usual dosage is to take them every day, but she wanted me to take them 5x a week instead, to give my body a break now and then. I had an EKG to make sure I was good to go for them, and I am also going to go back in 6 weeks. It’ll be good motivation to really stay on track.

So, I will state my goal right here! March 7th, is 6 weeks from today.

My goal is to lose 12 lbs by March 7th. that is 2 lbs per week, a very doable goal.

So, trip to the doctor = good. SHe was very nice, very knowledgeable, very good communicator. Muscle relaxed obtained, currently doing their trick on the back, YAY! (Oh my god, you have no idea how much better I feel already). Mental Check – not crazy, if I get crazier, check back in. Project skinny has got the a-ok by the Dr. and now I have a secret weapon in my corner to help out.

So, good day! Cool! I’m feeling good!

But this was actually the LEAST of the goodness that happened today!

This is a long post, so I’m going to break it up into to, because I especially don’t wnat the next part buried at all, because if anything it’s way cooler than me going to the doctor!

So, continued.

Wow, what a weekend.

I had SO MUCH fun last night playing poker with mostly strangers. It just made me realize how uncomfortable I have been feeling around some of my neighbors lately. And since it’s always a good idea to write as if whoever you’re writing about is reading it, I’m not going to say much, except that I was talking with some friends in the neighborhood and aparently it isn’t JUST me who feels this way. I am not sure I agree entirely everything they were saying, because I didn’t experience it myself, but I feel much better, and definitely the next time bunko rolls around, I’ll be able to cut loose and have fun without feeling weird, and that’s always good.

LIKE I DID LAST NIGHT. Oh my, I may never get invited to poker at this guy’s place again, tee hee. See, when I cut loose, I tend to blabber a lot (gee, a lot like this web space!) and sometimes really random things come out of me. So.. what were the highlights? Well, I was introduced to a new brand of vodka which seemed really good – very smooth, but affordable. I don’t know vodka, but this brand “Tito” (you can remember it because it rhymes with “Tivo!”) is apparently just as good as a premium vodka, like grey goose. Let’s see, so there was vodka, yum, we did have a bubble blowing contest at one point when some bubbilicious was passed out. And then after it wsa too hard to blow bubbles, there was a snapping/crackle contest. Of course there was poker, and I did win a few big hands, but ended up down over all. It was a nickel, dime, quarter game, and I took the cup of change that I used to use when I played change games a few years ago. The problem with this sort of game is you never know how much you started with, and therefore how far up or down you are when you’re done. I did know I was down though. The pokering was a lot of fun, a couple folks were fairly new to the game and caught on fairly quickly, and luckily my habit of staring at the cards and thinking out loud (usually talking myself out of calling when i should really stay in) was “HELPFUL!” instead of the usual “GAG HER UNTIL SHE STOPS TALKING! NO WAIT SHE’S GOING TO FOLD SO LET HER BLABBER SOME MORE!” Other than that, I will spare you the actual poker details because hearing about how I had 2 kings on the turn and then an ace came in that paired the board so that WE SPLIT THE POT AND OH IT WAS AMAZING! is usually about as boring as hearing someone recount their adventures in Risk. “And then I rolled a TWO! I tought I was done for, but then he rolled a ONE! HAHA!” Yeah. Boring.

I came home, and James wandered down, and I could tell something was bothering him. I have to say, I’m really patting myself on the back about this one, because the minute I looked at him, I could totally tell he was irked, even when he said, “Fine.” to my, “how’re you doing?” and he ‘fessed up when I pressed him (luckily it wasn’t about ME. Shew.) We cleaned up a little and went to bed and proceeded to talk until 1am.

I would have to say my worst fault is I get so freakin’ chatty when I’m tired. I mean REALLY CHATTY. I just talk and talk and talk and finally I just had to clamp my mouth shut and thank my lucky stars that my husband loves me and doesn’t want to slap me around when I keep him up until 1am before a work day.

One of the things I blathered on about to James last night, was I seem to have some sort of THING every couple of weeks. Maybe it’s because I let something bug me or build up for a few weeks and then it’s just too much to keep hold of, and I just need to let it spill out and throw something. Then it’s over, and I’m good for a few more weeks. Rinse, repeat.
Anyway, so there’s my weekend. No fancy ending. just,

THE END!

– amy will stare out at you for eternity from an over-sized pickle jar – stick an oversized novelty afro wig on top for fun, amy prefers purple.

Today’s lesson is in “HOW TO NOT GET SERVED WITH DIVORCE PAPERS:”

me: I made cookie dough today.
him: yes i saw it in the fridge.
me: i would have made the actual gingersnaps, but we were out of sugar. you have to make little balls and roll it around in sugar, and THEN bake them.
him: i remember.
me: they are ethan’s favorite!
him: he does love those gingersnaps!
me: maybe i’ll make the chocolate ones with powdered sugar next – your favorite!
him, very quickly: those are good, but they’re not my favorite.
me, very deliberately and then slightly dementedly: yes, i know they’re not your favorite. your favorites are the chocolate drop ones with frosting. but i tried to make your favorites. i made the cookies, and the frosting, but you said the frosting wasn’t right. so i made a different frosting, and still, it wasn’t the right one. so then i got your aunt’s frosting recipe that was from your grandmother and STILL you said it wasn’t right. I MADE THREE FROSTINGS FOR YOU AND NONE OF THEM WERE RIGHT AND THEN NONE OF THE COOKIES GOT EATEN EVEN THOUGH THEY ARE YOUR “FAVORITE”!
him: maybe i’ll have to track it down.
me, ignoring the previous, and quite gaily: So now, THESE are your new favorite!
him: You’re picking me a new favorite cookie?
me: Uh-huh.
him, very wisely, i might add: I see.

THE END!