Nov 28 2006
self portrait tuesday
it’s a bit past midnight, so that means it’s tuesday now. so here are the photos i took on friday when i needed a break from work. the hat is due to a non-hair day. “bad hair day” is when it wn’t do wha tyou want. “none hair day” is when you really don’t care what the hell it does, and don’t really want it to do anything anyway.
after i hit publish, i’m going to bed. *yawn* *damn work deadlines* *yay overtime* *yawn* so i’m sorry for the run-on sentences, bad grammar and punctuation now. Not really sorry though. More like, bite me 🙂
I realize that this is the wrong time for this, but I’ve been thinking about the past year. I think it all started when I realized I past my year blogging anniversary (um, btw, yay me! about that) and poked around at some of the past posts. Usually January is the time to reflect, renew the gym membership, watch what you’re eating, make resolutions, decide to become a better person, eradicate all credit card debt, cure cancer and end world hunger. but I’ve been feeling the “new year’s” vibe, and so decided to get a new haircut last week.
Looking at a few past posts, it’s nice to realize that I’m in a much better place right now in my head, and when I think about it, I know exactly why it is. Last year, I had pretty much given on up project skinny. I had been staying at home with my kids with no real motivation or purpose. And for the past few weeks, I had also pretty much tossed in the project skinny towel. It’s when I’m not happy with where I am (be it lack of sleep, lack of will power, lack of adults to talk to, or lack of a clean house, etc) that I get all mopey and depressed. As soon as I start to take action, then it snaps me out of it. going back to work, while a financial necessity at the time was a big catalyst in bringing me out of a major funk, but it still shows in some of those posts.
Taking action = end of the funk. It’s a nice thing to know.. but when I’m in the middle of mopeyness, it doesn’t necessarily help me much. Knowing that you have to climb out of the hole you dug yourself doesn’t make it any easier to start getting dirt under your fingernails. But the nice thing is once you DO get going, you usually feel pretty good and energized. It’s sticking to it that I am an utter failure at. 🙂 I have to figure out what to do about that.
It’s a little discouraging to look back at posts about losing weight, and realizing that if I had just kept with it, my body would be in a very different place right now. At the same time though, it’s a good thing. Today is first day of the rest of your life, and all that crap. I think all this reflection is what projected me toward my new hairdo. It’s always nice to do something totally different. For a day, or even a week, people stop and look at you in a diferent way and say, “Hey! Look at you! Wow! Cool! Looks nice!” (at least if you’re lucky). I’ve always found it to be a good way to step out of a funk. At least temporarily. In fact, I used to always get my hair cut the day before my birthday, so that even if no one knew it was my birthday, I would have people complimenting me all day and I’d feel nice.
I don’t think a camera ever points at me too long before I make a stupid face.
Having a new ‘do always motivates me to do the things that I had slowly slacked off doing, like blowdrying my hair, making sure there aren’t any cat hairs on my clothes before leaving, maybe even applying some MAKEUP (or at least mascara) (ahem. You can see it hasn’t helped me do anything about those eyebrows. EEP!) It makes you look at yourself the way others see you, which you never do. I was checking out the short hair in the mirror this evening and james gave me a funny look and asked what I was doing. “You see the new haircut all the time, but I still haven’t gotten used to it. *I* never see it!” Not only do others look at you differently, but you look at yourself differently too.
I am pretty happy. I feel energized. It’s time to take some names and kick some ass and makes some changes. I have so much to give thanks for and so many people to love. It’s gonna be a good year. Err. End of the year 🙂
-amy “SOMEONE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD GET ME SOME TWEEZERS AND SOME CHAPSTICK AAAAAAHHHHH!!”
3 Responses to “self portrait tuesday”
Wow! That is a change. Can’t see too much of it with the hat. I’m sure it looks fab-u-lous!
They do say, when you find yourself in a hole, stop digging. You rock, chica friend! Now I’ve got “To Live Is To Fly” in my head… “We all got holes to fill, them holes are all that’s real, some fall on you like a storm, sometimes you dig your own…” I applaud you and your Thanksgiving resolutions/revolutions and your wondrous pondering. Yeah!
Great shots. And I dig the hat too 🙂