1. Leaving every light on on the floor you’re not on. I don’t care that you didn’t turn them on. You left the room with the light on, and eventually the floor, and don’t you think our $350 electric bill is HIGH ENOUGH?2. Saying you’re “On it.” when I’m nudge you to go get the girlie in her crib at 8:00 7:00 am and is so bored and has been awake for so long that she’s kicking the wall through the bars of her enclosure, but not budging for another 20 minutes except to say (again without budging) as I get up and throw on some clothes, “Oh, I’ll get her.”

3. ….. The fact that that fucking game gets more face time than I do. Netflix, I will now be embracing you.